Pant Woes

I have some major issues when it comes to buying pants. Most people I complain to tell me I should be happy with my issues, but it doesn't console me. My pant issues range from plumber's butt to baggy hips, and length issues (either too short or too long). For the most part, finding a pair of pants that fit is a challenge. Most people, when they look at me, think I'm being facetious when I bring up these issues. I'm really not.

I get it, I'm skinny. I shouldn't have any issues with clothes fitting me, right? Well the sad truth is that I do. At 5'5" I'm at the mercy of the designers as to whether I'm considered average height or judging by some pants, tall. Most designers of women's pants assume that the woman has some curvature in her hips. I've got nothing, and there's nothing I hate more than feeling like I've got pouches of fabric on either side of my hips. Pants also don't like to stay up on me--even with a belt. (Probably because I'm also lacking a butt.) What's a gal like me to do?

For the past year, GAP has been my go to store for pants. Their jeans fit me well even if the name of the jeans is a bit much for me. Umm, I'll take two of the "Sexy bootcut," please. Are you kidding me? Why can't they just call them the skinny stick jeans that don't cause plumber's butt? Don't you have to have some curves to be "sexy"? Just this past Saturday, I splurged and ordered myself a nice pair of "hip slung" white linen trousers from the GAP. (I like the name hip slung, doesn't sound like something I don't want to say in front of my kids.) The pants were close to $60, but with a 25% off coupon, and some GAP rewards certificates, I got my nice trendy pants for under $30. I was confident that they would fit perfectly.

My GAP order arrived today. Immediately I was excited that my white pants had arrived. I tried them on right away and the excitement instantly died. They're a bit long, the pockets are are toeing the line of making me feel like I have pouches on my hips and the waistband is loose. Ugh! I want so badly for these pants to fit me. My only hope would be for them to shrink in the wash. They're linen, so I think it's possible they could shrink, but I'm not sure how likely that is. Part of me wonders if ordering a 4 would help, but then I think there will be other fit issues.

I know there are more important things in the world to worry about than these white pants that won't see any use until May, but I'm bummed. I had such high hopes for these pants. I sincerely doubt I'll be gaining any weight to make the waistband fit since nothing sticks to me as it is. And really, who gains weight to fit in pants? I think that's an almost unheard of practice.