Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Comically Frustrating

I know in the past I've mentioned how praying for patience has backfired on me.  The problem with praying for patience is God will most certainly present you with numerous situations in which to try out that patience for which you prayed.  What remains to be seen whether or not the patience which you requested was actually granted.  Situations to try it?  Yeah, those are offered in abundance, but the patience, not so much.

So in the aftermath of a particularly trying day and what I'm sure was a very poorly thought out prayer [fine, multiple prayers].  I can't help but hear Nathan Lane as Max Bialystock shouting at me "Never pray for patience!" [Ok, so I've changed the quote where he shouts at Leo "Never put your own money in the show!" to suit my situation, sue me.]  From now on I'm going to either pray for impatience [I've got that one covered!] or I'm going to take a St. Augustine approach and pray for patience, but not yet!

So how was your morning?  Mine felt like I was put through the gauntlet of patience.  While it wasn't the best morning, I did handle it better than I might have if I didn't keep reminding myself that I didn't want my next confession to be any worse than it already was.  So amazing how the thought of having to repeat the necessary details of one of my tirades at a later date can make me stop and think for a moment.

At 5:30 Katie started crying, as I expected her to.  She didn't seem like she was hungry, so I popped a pacifier in her mouth and she went back to sleep for another 20 minutes.  When she woke the second time I decided that it was time to change and feed her.  Ten minutes later I was carting her back to her crib fully aware that Madeline was going to wake up any minute.  Cue spiritual warfare.  After five minutes of sleep,  Madeline loudly tromps into my room to ask if "part of the house" was having a power failure.  Man, I hate those partial power failures!  After some investigative questions it became evident that the "power failure" was simply that a bedroom night light and the ceiling light fixture in the bathroom had both had their light bulbs burn out.  I don't have to tell you that I was incredibly annoyed, but I handled it as patiently as I could.  Madeline would probably tell you that I was horribly mean for not agreeing to replace the light bulbs instantly, and for also making her use her bathroom to take a shower.  The room still had plenty of light from the other five light bulbs that were brightly burning.  I suppose the Bloody Mary scare has her on edge.

Roughly 45 minutes later I hear Madeline pathetically screaming for me, like a two year old, while Katie, Ellie and I were sleeping upstairs.  My alarm was due to go off in two minutes and she chose to wake me by screaming instead.  She was sitting on the couch in the family room with nothing wrong with her.  The problem was she heard someone knock on the front door at 6:58. [face-palm]  Yeah, I have a difficult time believing this one, too.  So Madeline: 1. Thought screaming for me before 7am when there wasn't an emergency, like her having sliced open her finger, again.  2. Thought that I was going to open the door before 7am when I wasn't expecting anyone and was wearing only a spaghetti strap tank top and pj shorts.  She justified this by telling me that I've told them to go and sit on the family room couch when the door bell rings and we aren't expecting anyone.  True, I've told my children who act like excited puppy dogs anytime the doorbell rings, to sit down in the family room and be quiet any time the bell rings and we aren't expecting someone.  This is all due to a series of events where they kept flinging the door open to anyone who came to it.  Of course, they never listen when it comes to this rule, and shouting for me, is not part of it.  Actually, they're to pretend that no one is home when the bell rings.

After I had taken a few minutes to calm down and stop thinking of all the things I'd like to yell at her, I was able to talk to Madeline about the door debacle. Maybe I am being more patient!  I explained to her that shouting for me like a two year old while everyone else was asleep was not the way to handle the situation.  I reminded her that she could have quietly walked upstairs to tell me she thought someone was at the door.

Then the fun of Madeline not having done anything other than showing this morning began.  After being awake for 70 minutes Madeline had only showered, woken me up twice, and packed her lunch for school.  Eating breakfast hadn't crossed her mind, nor had putting on shoes been a thought.  I quickly bandaged her cut thumb again and set her to getting the rest of her morning routine completed by 7:30.

Next it was Ellie's turn.  Because of the burnt out light she didn't want to shower in her bathroom.  But, mean mom that I am, I insisted.  Ellie made sure Bloody Mary wouldn't get her by showering with the bathroom door open.  Yeah, that works.  Once she was done, she decided to pack her lunch box and ignore the mess she left in her room and the bathroom.

Once I had showered and gotten dressed I retrieved the now awake Katie so I could feed her.  Ellie decided to obnoxiously read for Katie's dining pleasure.  Babies who are nearly six months old are easily distracted and so I quickly became covered in sticky drops of milk.  Katie, not wanting my clothes to be left spit up copious amounts of milk all over my sweater minutes before I had to take Ellie to school.

I know, you're all wishing you could have such an action packed three hours like this tomorrow morning.  Well the good news is you can!  First you need to pray for patience multiple times and then  feel free to stop by my house and take over the morning routine tomorrow and Thursday if you're up for the patience challenge.  Just be quiet so I can get a little extra sleep and let me know you're coming so we'll open the door for you!

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