Tuesday, December 20, 2011

People Will Buy Anything

I have a severe dislike of infomercials and commercials that assume the viewer is a complete idiot.  As I watch intelligent programming I get bombarded every few minutes with commercials that I find insulting.  There are commercials selling knives to people who are incapable of cutting through a tomato.  Really?  Since when did cutting into a tomato become difficult? Apparently, for the portion of the population who can't figure out how to cut into a tomato (We're not talking about a pineapple or a coconut here, folks) the ad wizards have come up with many products to solve this vexing problem.  They now sell knives that can cut through tin cans AND tomatoes.  Maybe I'm doing something wrong, but I have yet to have a need to slice tin cans open.  I guess someone out there is totally unaware that a thing called a can opener exists.  Those things do a bang up job when it comes to opening a can.

Commercials that promise to solve the age old problem of using a pesky blanket irritate me.  As I lay on the couch with my coffee bean throw blanket, I can't help but look at the television perplexed that there are people out there who can't figure out how to use a blanket.  It's not rocket science, simply place the blanket over yourself and you're golden.  Maybe my kids are just geniuses, but they have been able to use a blanket since they were old enough to crawl.  For those who can't figure out how a blanket is supposed to work they sell this irritating product called a Snuggie. The commercials for this product make me want to scream.  As if Snuggies weren't bad enough for the blanket using impaired they have now come out with a new product.  It's a Forever Lazy.  The commercial for this ridiculous product made me wonder if it was a joke.  Granted, I saw the commercial rather late at night and thought maybe it was intended as a spoof.  After discovering that it was a real product I can't help but wonder 1. WHY would anyone want this?  2. Do people realize this thing is basically a sleeper for adults? and 3. Is using a blanket really that difficult?  Not to mention why would anyone want to buy a product called Forever Lazy that pretty much insinuates that the person who uses it is a lazy slob?

These idiotic products and their commercials have lead me to believe that people will buy anything.  It's actually rather sad.  I suppose if I were a more opportunistic person with no conscience I would prey on the feeble minded and create a stupid poorly made product and market it as the solution to a problem that doesn't exist.   And if you are one of those people who are taxed by the difficulties of using a blanket, drop me an email.  I've got these great recyclable, multifunctional carrying devices called plastic bags that I can sell you for the amazingly low price of $5.95 each.  Contact me within the next two weeks and I'll toss in two more for free.

1 comment:

  1. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA KAREN!!!! The Forever Lazy is the most RIDICULOUS thing I have ever seen in my LIFE! Did you see how they have the "flap" too? As if you are so stupid you couldn't use the zipper in the front??? You crack me up! Sign me up for one of them there "plastic bags". I can't wait to see how well those work ;)

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