Monday, March 1, 2010

I get around just fine, thanks!

Last year I got my temporary AARP membership card in the mail.  This was shortly before my 31st birthday.  I thought AARP was a little premature in sending that nice welcome letter to me.  I'm not sure where they got the idea that I was in my 50's, but they were clearly mistaken. My parents, who are in their 60's and 70's found it rather amusing.

Today as I was sifting through my junk mail I noticed there was a letter from The Scooter Store addressed to me.  Oh joy!  It came with a "mobility assessment".  Inside, the letter says "Take this test and then take the next step to regaining your independence."  Really?  Sure those, rascal carts at Target look pretty cool, but I'm fine with walking.  Besides, if I had a scooter, how would the kids keep up with me?  And let's take into account that I have difficulty pushing a shopping cart without running into things.  Does anyone really want me to drive a motorized shopping cart?  I doubt it.

I decided to look at the mobility assessment for the fun of it.  They tell you if you answer yes to any of the questions to call them.  Only because I found the test to be rather funny, I'm going to repost it here with my answers.

1. Do you sometimes feel left out by not being able to get together with family and friends? Yes (I have children and oftentimes their needs/obligations come before my own.)
2. Do you have health-related issues that limit your mobility? No
3. Are you having trouble getting to your kitchen or dining facility by yourself for a meal?  Yes, the aforementioned children frequently insist on accompanying me to the kitchen and dining facilities.
4. Is it difficult for you to get to the bathroom on your own?  Yes, but I'm finding as the years progress that I can usually sneak into the bathroom once or twice a day unnoticed.  Once again, the children generally make this an impossibility.
5. Are you unable to easily access your clothes and dress yourself each day? No, but my four year old would have to answer yes to this.  And, my husband and 8 year old often need me to help them find their clothes [which, I must add are always where they're supposed to be].
6. Have you lost the ability to operate a manual wheelchair inside your home? Yes, furniture placement and random toy speed bumps would make wheelchair operation highly unlikely in my home.
7. Are you feeling like a bother to others due to limited mobility? No
8. Have you fallen in the past 12 months? Yes, at least once a month.  Last Friday I fell up the steps.

Think I should call the Scooter Store and get my "valuable 32-page Puzzles and Games booklet?"  Based on the mobility assessment, I think the whole family could use their own personal scooters.

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