Fast Times in Fourth Grade

Madeline got in to the car after school and announced that Mortimer* wanted her to call him tonight.  "Really?  And why does Mortimer want you to call him?" I asked.  Madeline didn't know but he just wanted her to call.  I asked her if she thought Mortimer liked her and she told me she didn't know.  Ugh.  I decided to use Mom Tactic #48 and avoided encouraging any phone conversations by means of distraction.  After all, kids today don't actually hold phone conversations.  They text and grunt.  They don't talk anymore.  Heck, they can't even spell out simple words like YOU or ARE.

Then, Mom Tactic #48 lead my nine year old to share some fascinating information with me.  Mortimer's mom told him that he can pick to of his very bestest friends to come over for a sleep over at the end of the school year.  Isn't that great?  And, here's the best part....Mortimer would like Madeline to come over to his house for the sleep over.  Isn't that terrific?  I promptly told her that it's not happening. EVER.  Sorry to disappoint you Mortimer and other boy who's name escapes me, but my daughter will not be sleeping over.

I told Madeline that she could tell Mortimer at school tomorrow that she WILL NOT be sleeping over at his house and to pick another friend to invite.  Madeline told me she thought it was odd that he wanted her to come over and that she didn't want to go.  She's not a fan of sleepovers even with her best girlfriends.

Maybe the boy's intentions were purely innocent, but I don't care to find out.  As long as Bryan and I have breath in our bodies and our daughters are dependent on us for food and shelter, they will not be sleeping over at boys' houses.  No way, no how!

*To protect the dubious identity of the rather forward young lad, his name has been changed to one I feel is befitting of any boy who thinks it's even remotely appropriate to invite my daughter to his house to spend the night.