Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Exhausted

I'm not sure what happened to the last two days.  It's all a blur of painting, pulling weeds, sweeping up dirt and handing my girls snacks and juice.

I've spent most of the past two days either on my knees or hunched over.  My back, knees and hands are really sore, and I'm sunburned. The good news is I have a lot to show for it.  I have three garden areas that are weed free.  I even went so far as to prune back a lot of the plants that we getting out of control.  Almost all of the trim in my kitchen and entryway is freshly painted.  I have a 6 foot section of woodwork that is blocked by the fridge that still needs painting.  I have one side of a door left to paint and then just the back of my front door and kitchen door will need to be painted.  The front and kitchen doors are my Friday project.  I need the locks off of those doors and I need to be able to have those doors left unlocked for at least 4 hours so the paint can dry.  Since Bryan works from home on Friday it's the perfect day for me to tackle the doors.

I'm beginning to suffer from Mommy guilt since I've been spending more time on my projects than I have with my kids.  Madeline is always busy playing with kids in our neighborhood so she's not bothered by my preoccupation.  Poor Ellie on the other hand spent most of today wandering aimlessly.  I took breaks to spend some time with her while Madeline was at school but I still feel like I neglected her.  I know she wanted to play Candyland with me earlier in the day but when I finished with the trim she moved on to wanting a snack and the game never got played.  Madeline played it with her when she got home from school but the game ended with Ellie screaming and crying.  I always make sure Ellie wins at least one round before we put the game away.  Madeline isn't always willing to throw the game for her little sister. Today she wasn't willing to lose.  

Ellie's day wasn't all bad.  She did manage to score a lolipop at the parish office today.  I had to get the rosary I brought for Madeline for her First Communion to get it Blessed.  If I didn't I'd be dealing with Dad induced guilt in about 2 1/2 weeks.  

My dad was pretty concerned a few weeks ago because the rosary beads I had Madeline's First Communion pictures taken with weren't Blessed.  I think it's kind of funny that my dad made such a big deal over this.  I could see if I had been raised Catholic and should have known better but, that's not the case.  

My dad is Catholic and my mother was raised Episcopalian.  My mom wasn't willing to allow her kids to be raised Catholic.  To hear my dad tell the story it all boils down to her not wanting her parents to disapprove.  So in some sort of compromise, my parents selected Lutheran  as the religion for my brothers and me.  Makes sense, right?  After I hit third grade I managed to convince my mother not to make me go to the awful Sunday School at the Lutheran church anymore (a new pastor who wasn't well liked helped the situation).  Prior to that I was pretty skilled at hanging out in the stairwell and hardly ever making it to my Sunday School class.  I knew in my gut from a very early age that the Lutheran church wasn't the place for me. On the occasions when my brothers would catch me dodging class and bring me to where I was supposed to be the teachers would make this big deal about the new kid in the class. Pretty funny when you think about how they didn't know they were missing a kid.  That would never fly in the RE program at our church.  

Once Bryan and I got engaged I knew that I had my golden moment to convert to Catholicism. My mom wasn't happy about it and I'm pretty sure to this day she still isn't.  She tells me frequently that Madeline would make a great Protestant.  No thanks, Mom.  Essentially my  parents think that I only converted so we could get married in the Catholic church.  I'm not sure how they forgot me asking them to let me go to CCD when I was a kid for several years (Imagine that, while many of my friends were wishing they didn't have to go to CCD, I was wishing I could go.).  I essentially used my engagement as a catalyst to convert so I wouldn't have to be hassled by my mother.  So nine years ago today I was confirmed at the Easter Vigil.  No one in my family was there, but Bryan and my best friend (my sponsor) were.  

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