Starving Mr. Furkins

If Mr. Furkins could blog, he'd tell you all about how I'm starving him.  How I've stripped him of his right to beg for food at the kitchen table, and how I've banished him from hanging out at my feet while I prepare food.  I'm sure he'd wax on about how inhumanely I'm treating him.

It's well established that Oscar is my personal scapegoat.  I won't readily admit it, but I like that he hangs out in the kitchen with me.  If I spill something or make a mess, not only is Mr. Furkins there to take the blame, but he's also there to help clean up.  For the most part, I think he's more than willing to assume blame if it means he can score some people food.

The neighbors outback have a Jug dog, too. (Jack Russell/Pug mix)  He and Oscar have some traits in common, but they're as different as they are alike.  The neighbor's dog looks like a stuffed sausage.  He's overweight.  Up until a few months ago I was always amazed at how thin Oscar looked next to Dillon.  Dillon's people bring him to the school everyday to pick up the kids. (Mr. Furkins is too much of a spaz to visit the school grounds.)  I've been remarking since about November that Dillon looks like he's losing weight.  Mostly, the neighbors just say something to the effect of "You think so?", "Maybe, but I'm not sure." or "Really?" and I, of course insist that he looks like he's slimming down and starting to look a bit like Oscar.  Never once did it occur to me that perhaps maybe my dog was turning into a little stuffed sausage.  Not a chance.  The copious amounts of people food he consumes can't possibly be packing on any extra weight, can they?

Bryan took Oscar to the vet on Saturday for his long overdue appointment.  He was supposed to go just before or after Christmas but something happened and the appointment got pushed back.  Then Bryan got stuck in a meeting for his rescheduled appointment and had to reschedule again.  When he finally got in to the vet this Saturday, Bryan learned that Mr. Furkins was about 2-3 lbs over weight. (He's now 19lbs.  In the past they told me he should be between 15 and 16lbs.)  On a dog his size this amounts to 10lbs on us per pound on him.  One of his hind knees pops out because of the weight. The fix?  Mr. Furkins has to stop mooching food from us and slim down.

Mr. Furkins is clearly not happy with me.  He acts offended that he's not getting constant handouts.  If we didn't have so much snow this Winter, I'm sure he would have been able to exercise off some of his people food, but instead he sat around the house like a lazy creature.  Once all of this snow melts, he will have to start taking walks or chase bunnies and squirrels in the back yard.